When I married Lynn, I got a bonus gift.Like me, Lynn had lifelong friends from grade school and beyond. (Lynn and Bart have been friends for nearly 50 years.) This group gathers once a year or at least every other year. They allow wives and girlfriends along and also children and soon, grandchildren, I suspect. This group (my friend in-laws) used to bond over hiking, backpacking and camping. Soon backpacks gave way to tents, then car camping and now hotels. They dubbed themselves the Coatimundis after a camping trip where a pack of coatis appeared.
This past weekend the Coatis converged on the J-T Ranch in Cottonwood. It was billed as the passing of the torch to the second generation. Saturday afternoon was filled with bocce ball, horseshoes, naps and many adult beverages.
Saturday night (after the most delicious Porterhouse steak I’ve ever tasted – thank you Chef Bart) we had the torch ceremony. All participants were instructed to wear costumes and at 7:30 the parade began.
The “elders” arrived in caveman/wizard/Greek god attire. They had scripted a program including an intermission. First up, initiate the second generation into the “tribe”. Bob’s son, Logan was first. He’s 18 and has only been with our group a handful of times so I thought he might wince at the ceremony. But he bounced out of his chair and eagerly answered the questions 1) why do you want to be a coati? 2) what special talent do you possess? Down the line with a lone drum beat in the background, the ceremony continued: Reilly (Dennis and Annette’s beautiful 25 year old daughter), Lisa (Bobb and Joyce’s gorgeous progeny). Lionel, Lisa’s boyfriend (A Marine just back from Iraq! He wholeheartedly participated.) Reilly’s friend - Ashley, Shari’s daughter - Daphne, then Shari and finally Leah.
At 8 years old, Leah is the youngest. She wasn’t quite sure what was happening but she knew she wanted to be part of it.
My brave little girl stood in the middle of the room in her pirate costume and said she wanted to be a coati because it’s “fun” and as to her special talent, she replied “my daddy can take a coin out of my ear.”
All second generation candidates were accepted. Also girlfriends and Bianca, Hal’s new bride.
The grand finale was an epic poem penned by our Bob McCraley. With multiple verses, he managed to name all the coatis and include an anecdote about each one.
I kept thinking how lucky I am to be part of this group. When I looked around the room and saw the smiles and tears and thoughtful faces, I knew that our initiation ceremony had done more than playfully welcome the next generation. We had recognized the significance of our group.
With only a decade separating us from social security, many in the room no longer have living parents. Many do not have children and never will. Some lucky people like me have wonderful parents AND a great daughter AND layers of friendship outside this group. I thought, how am I so blessed? What did I do to deserve a life brimming with family and so many great friends?
I think the initiation ceremony passed the torch on two levels. The adult children now join us as peers and our friends have evolved into our family. Our chosen family. This is the family that will see us through the next adventures in life.
Thank you my dear friends. Thank you for a great Memorial Day weekend. Bobb, Joyce, Lisa, Lionel, Dennis, Annette, Reilly, Ashley, Bart, Nancy, Mike, Deny, Gretchen, Hal, Bianca, Rob, Bird, Pat, Helene, Dennis, Bob, Logan, Shari, Daphne and Leah. And thanks to my Lynn for giving me the gift of these wonderful people.
